A BIG God Wink....

In a recent post I introduced "God Winks"....

.....those times in life when there is no other explanation for something than God just winked at you!!!!!....

those times when something happens that is not just a coincidence or happenstance but the ONLY explanation is that the God of the universe sent you a clear message and 

He winked at you!!!

One of my favorite all time God Winks happened when I was a sophomore at Baylor University....

.....I was having a difficult time....

the person I had been dating for 3 years showed a side of himself that I simply could not accept. 

The strength imparted to me in that moment to walk away from him still to this very day astonishes me!!!

but I ended the relationship and did walk away without even once looking back....

it was excruciating....

I called my mother and asked if she would come spend the weekend with me.....

.....I needed my mom!.....

She came up almost immediately, but before she arrived I went to lunch with a friend from my church back home. 

(he was a few years older and looked after me as an older brother while we were at Baylor)

I mentioned during our visit that my mother was coming up for the weekend and he asked what our plans were.....

I went through the typical "what you do when your parents come to visit you at college," 

and then I said, 

"there is a church I have been wanting to attend and I was thinking we would go there on Sunday"

When I told him which church I was speaking of I could tell from his immediate reaction that he did not approve!!!!!!

He paused for a moment and then he said,

 "well, if I were you I wouldn't go there........ and I certainly would NOT take my mom!!!"

This was at a time in Southern Baptist churches when there was an ongoing controversy about what was appropriate behavior in church...

(I grew up in a church led by my grandfather where you sang the hymns with almost a monotone voice 

(if it is possible to "sing" in a monotone voice)

and you sat up straight and did not say a single word during the service.

(There was certainly no "shouting back" at the pastor when you agreed with what he said)

This particular church that I wanted to attend was a Baptist church, but it was considered a charismatic church and not AT ALL what our church back home was like.

I said to my friend, "well.......if I'm going to go I think I would rather have my mom with me when I do"

He shook his head and we moved on to other conversation.....

Mom came and we spent the weekend, again doing what you do in college with mom in town, eating out and exploring the campus and meeting people, all the typical college student activities.

I had told her of my visit and the caution about the church, but mom said "Let's give it a try"

As Sunday morning arrived, we got ready for church and made our way....

we arrived a little early and the early service was still in the sanctuary so as we were waiting in the foyer we picked up a bulletin.

As we were standing scanning the bulletin, we both saw the scripture at the top of the first page,

"But those who trust in the Lord will renew their strength.

They will soar with wings like eagles.

They will run and not grow weary.

They will walk and not faint."

Isaiah 40:31

At the same time mom and I looked at each other and said,

"Oh look!!! It's DanDan's favorite verse!"

I opened my bible and took out a book mark that my grandmother had made for me with that verse and a picture of my DanDan playing golf.

(I spent most of the first 9 years of my life on the golf course with my DanDan!!)

about that time the doors opened and the early service exited and we walked in and took our seats.

SMACK DAB IN THE MIDDLE!!!  

that was unlike both of us but that is where we landed.

The service began with a song that so clearly was my prayer that morning!!!

I couldn't hold back the tears, and neither could my mom.

As we sat down and the pastor began to speak it was honestly as though he was speaking directly to me!

The tears became harder and harder to hold back.

I felt a tap on my shoulder and I thought for sure that the person behind me was going to ask me to keep it together.....but instead the older man behind me handed me a tissue and patted my shoulder.

After the sermon the pastor said that we were going to have a time of prayer

(in EVERY church service I had ever been in before "a time of prayer" meant we would all bow our heads and the pastor would pray or we would all pray silently...)

that is not what they did here.....

again....a tap on the shoulder...

I turned around and the nice older man with the supply of tissues asked me if he and his wife could pray for me.

I was a bit confused....but my mother and I turned around in the pew toward one another and put our hands on the back of the pew, he and his wife both placed their hands on our hands and he began to pray.

.....but this was not just any prayer.....

this man prayed like he knew me!!!!

In shock after the time of prayer concluded we stood to sing one last song that were the very words I would have spoken at that moment had I been face to face with God!!!!

MORE TEARS!!!

(another tap on the shoulder and another fresh tissue!!!) 

As soon as the song concluded the service did as well and my mother and I turned to thank the man and his wife behind us, but they were already gone!!!

Quickly mom and I went out into the foyer and we spotted them...

As we approached them we both thanked them for their prayers and of course the tissues!!!

We visited for a while and they offered a home cooked meal anytime at their home whenever I felt homesick.

The man's wife handed my mother her husbands business card  with their contact info and we hugged and said goodbye.

As mom and I were walking out of the church I was talking to her only to realize she was not beside me....

I stopped and looked up the stairs at the exit doors and she was frozen at the top of the stairs staring at her left hand.

I asked if she was ok and my words startled her out of the apparent daze she was in....

 she walked down the stairs to me and with no words showed me the business card.....

The man with the tissues who prayed for me as if he had known me my entire life was named 

H. E. Lee

(My DanDan was Hubert Eugene Lee)

we were both speechless and walked to the car without a word.

We got to the car and sat down and as the car started and the music came on the song on the radio was this.....

Chris Tomlin - Everlasting God (with lyrics)

A guitar teacher with years of experience. For more information on guitar lessons check out my private lessons website www.stuartlovibond.com but…

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Strength will rise as we wait upon the Lord
We will wait upon the Lord
We will wait upon the Lord (repeat)

Our God, You reign forever
Our hope, our Strong Deliverer
You are the everlasting God
The everlasting God
You do not faint
You won't grow weary

Strength will rise as we wait upon the Lord
We will wait upon the Lord
We will wait upon the Lord

Our God, You reign forever
Our hope, our Strong Deliverer
You are the everlasting God
The everlasting God
You do not faint
You won't grow weary

You're the defender of the weak
You comfort those in need
You lift us up on wings like eagles

Our God, You reign forever
Our hope, our Strong Deliverer
You are the everlasting God
The everlasting God
You do not faint
You won't grow weary 

You're the defender of the weak
You comfort those in need
You lift us up on wings like eagles

From everlasting, to everlasting
God you're everlasting


Needless to say at this point the tears were uncontrollable!!!!!
and at that moment we knew we were in the presence of the Great Comforter!!!!

May you never miss those times when God winks and you are consumed by His love and adoration for you!!!!
Happy Friday!!!

The Right Thing

This afternoon as I drove through downtown from my home, on my way to church, I heard this song....and I really tried to listen to more than just the words.....
I thought about all the times in life when I have wanted to do the "right thing" ....sometimes I did what I thought was right, and sometimes I just wasn't bold enough to do anything, sometimes I was just in a hurry, and then there have been, and still are times when I don't even know what the "right' thing is....
do I speak up, do I keep quiet, do I get involved or do I stay out of it, do I risk my pride to offer an opinion?!?
I don't have the answers, and I don't know that I ever will but......
today as I made a turn I make at least once on any given day a man caught my eye from a distance....He looked homeless and I immediately began to wonder what his life must be like, did he have a hungry belly, did he feel hopeless, had he ever known love? these may seem like silly thoughts to think about a random stranger who at that moment I could only see from about his ribs up......
I saw a police officer behind me and of course did the.."am I doing anything wrong" check for a second~and as I was going through the checklist I noticed the man I had seen was now walking into the street, and was walking in the middle lane of oncoming traffic. As I approached him I realized he literally had nothing. He was naked and dirty and seemed lost and unaware of cars that were trying to keep from hitting him. The police officer pulled over and before what I assumed happened did I had turned onto the next street.
This has stayed in my mind since that moment....
It is so easy to get caught up in our own little space and do what we do and not think about the world in which we live.....but tonight this man startled me out of the fog!!!! ...this man clearly has some concerns that many of us will never understand.... we have clothes on our backs, we have more than enough food to eat...... we are surrounded by people who love us, encourage us, and when need be rescue us when we make a wrong turn and travel down the dangerous road..... and we are most often in a "safe place" ( on our electronic device scanning facebook)
but for a moment let's go down this "road" with this fairly young man. I don't know if there were is any type of drug or alcohol involvement, and I don't know the state of his mind(and those are all issues that concern me greatly)....but......I wonder .....who will help him? who will love him? who will be there for him? will anyone? or will we all just be shocked and disgusted by the situation? I pray for that police officer that picked him up. Obviously, it would not have been wise for me to get involved in the situation and I knew that, but it was the police officers job and I pray that he was kind and loving and caring and that somehow through that interaction some good came of a scary and very heartbreaking moment.
I do believe that God continues to mold and shape us into the people He created us to be through the experiences He allows in our lives.(I pray that the walk down that road led to some hope for this man)....... In my life, I believe He has protected me in so many ways. I was born into a family that loved me and cared for me better than I could have ever imagined. I was taught to think for myself and to be able to wrestle with right and wrong until a clear answer was shown, not just trust someone else's truth for my own.... I was show examples every moment of "Love God, Love people" and I saw people of all "categories" treated simply as "people".....respected, cared for, shown kindness, and welcomed in without expectation or judgement.
My struggle daily is how to show that love to others......I have been wrestling with some decisions, that if I am honest are selfish ones, for quite some time now and they have consumed me. They have been all I can think about, talk about, etc...they sometimes keep me up at night and keep me out of the "moments" in the day. I think most anyone who might take the time to read this post most likely knows me, and therefor knows that I call myself a Christian....but probably has no idea of my constant wrestling match with my own salvation.....I believe at my core that God loved us first,(all of us!!!!) that He created us for a purpose (ALL of us), and that He planned in advance a purpose for us. So why do I struggle with my purpose? Why do I struggle with why my life doesn't look like I always thought it would? Why is my life chalk full of decisions that seem so difficult right now? Why am I so sensitive to things that I have no control over, and why do I feel at such a deep level? AND.... why did the experience today resonate in a way that helped me understand that through this time lately I have felt much like this man.....EXPOSED!!! A Catholic Priest that I greatly admire and studied under for about 2 years once said to me...."Kimberly, instead of trying to get OUT of your own head, why not hang out there for a while and see what you might can learn"....I AM one of THOSE people who feel at my very core and my emotions are very much a driving force in everything in my life....I have read all the books and tried all the "practices" to not always follow my feelings, and I do think there is a time and a place to trust your feelings...not always...but I also believe that we cannot deny the gift that is that emotional level of our being. So many of us try and push it down bc it doesn't always feel good and it is sometimes very scary!!
What if he/she/the world doesn't love me back? etc....
But today, when I was startled out of the fog, I was led down a road I think I will be traveling for quite sometime....maybe until the time comes when I am no longer traveling in this world......but what can I do to love better? Without expectation of reciprocation....but bc I am loved and I was created to love...
In my recent struggles I have been able to keep the secret from many people and go on pretending life is just fine, but the visual today and the sadness that it brought to my heart was an awakening...
We live in a world full of people who are hurting and struggling and just trying to take one more step.....and there are times for all of us that we aren't sure if we will be able to take that next step......lately there has been so much media attention focused on creating more division and fear in all areas of humanity...I have been broken-hearted and angry and struggled with my place in all this and I have not said a lot...but....the reality is NONE of us has it all right!!!! NOT ONE OF US!!! and we can not possibly put ourselves in someone else's circumstances and know how we would handle a certain situation.....but that is not our job....our job is simply to love....beyond all else....just love.....EVERYONE!!!.......through differences and similarities...through good times and bad.....through harmony and dissension......May we all do our job well ...atleast in this moment.....we will get to the next moment when it is time....

Do Something - Matthew West

Here's a simple lyric video I did for my church to this beautiful song! Enjoy!

Be Near

I have recently seen-through a friend who has grown so dear to me the need to live out Galatians 6:2 "Share each others burdens"
I know I have withdrawn at times when a friend was struggling bc I didn't know how or what to do or say.......we are not expected to.....we just need to be there to "share" the burden and through our prescence remind them "you are not alone!!!"

Be Near - Shane Bernard

A video praise song for Be near. If you want to talk to me about email me at cth1995@comcast.net

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The struggle with the struggles....

I wonder how many Christians struggle with "struggles"......I recently had a conversation with my dad about some difficult decisions in my life and some of my own words shocked me!!! I believe in a God who saves, who is so much bigger than I can fathom,and who loves me more than I can even try to understand.......but sometimes life throws things at us that we just are not prepared for and He seems silent...and we are confused.....I know I am not the only one who has ever experienced this and it doesn't mean, (as a woman said to me recently) that I am "clearly just developing my faith" ......first of all I hope I am ALWAYS developing my faith and second.....take a look at some of what David wrote in Psalms......our struggles do have a purpose...... I know that but I also know they are difficult ......and they hurt....... and we are sad sometimes and disappointed, but God promised He will make ALL things new and that He already has a plan in motion for us that is good and full of hope,,....I am holding tight to that today!!!!

Addison Road - What Do I Know Of Holy w/Lyrics

What Do I Know Of Holy by Addison Road set to pictures with lyrics.

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